Obsolete When All Are Employed

Before and After

Yes, cooking oil.  And 10 pounds of it. Don’t believe it?

Another Before & After

Apparently because of the recession, people who can’t afford professional botox and plastic surgery are resorting to home-made efforts.

‘Standing Fan’ otherwise known as Hang Mioku is an example of someone who failed to auto-plastic surgery herself at home.

Oh…and there’s more…

Yet another...Before & After

Too much…but there is a lesson to be learned….

She was not a victim of recession (more a plastic surgery addict…but perhaps the silicone became much too expensive after a while…who knows?) but this mom from Twin Cities is:

Silicone lube is different than silicone used in plastic surgery. But don't use this information to try something else please!

She wanted bigger lips, didn’t want to pay for botox and ended up buying silicone lube and injected herself with it.  Now she is disfigured because the silicone isn’t absorbed by the body.  She has to pay thousands more to fix it.

So please, please no matter how desperate you get, don’t try this at home or in your car or wherever.  Natural beauty is the best!

Obsolete When All Are Employed

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Conditions for the Broke and Unemployed

I guess my job is worse ... but at least it gets the "job" done

The Right to be quartered and have Quality of Life

No unemployed being shall, in time of peace or war be denied the proper conditions to live as a healthy human being.

If anyone tells me that I am not fit to be housed, receive proper health care, or have access to educational opportunities or the ability to buy certain necessities like toilet paper because I don’t have money, I’m not broke, the system is!

Many argue that health care should not be a right because that allows the government to control how we live (aka regulate us if we want to do something crazy like sky dive because it’s ‘not healthy’). But if broke people are expected to scrape up pennies from their couch to PAY UP FRONT for the extraction of wisdom teeth, a regular doctor’s checkup, a gyno check up, an eye exam, that is a problem.

1) Number one, I can’t help growing useless teeth

Yup, I like to be useless. And No, I'm not in league with the oppressors.

2) I can’t help being a woman (who by default is susceptible to PMS, certain cancers and uterus problems)

I'm a ram!

3) I CAN’T HELP BEING DARWINISTIC (why should celebrities and politicians be the sole survivors?)

It takes a while for me to look ... well good. So let's hurry up and fix the system!

Many argue that we can’t make it a right because people will take advantage of the system (just ask a nurse about homeless people). Sad as that may be, we still live in a poverty measurement based on the purchasing power parity (PPP) of 1963 and the dollar today ain’t worth nilly to the dollar back then. FACT: Bad things happen even if you do make the right decisions so you can’t make system that punishes every one.

If you ask me where we are going to get that money? Maybe if our head honchos stopped holding all these fancy ceremonies, in which catering a ONE DINNER party for 100 people can cost up to 16,000 + dollars (I cater events , so I know) and reallocate/ rebudget that to the wellbeing of the people, that’s a start.Or if they’re worried about presentation and face, why not hold a charity event (no food), bring in some toothless kids and then make every one feel guilty for living an extravagant life.

The 2008 poverty threshold measurement for a family of four was around 22,025 dollars BEFORE TAX. Did anyone ever hear of INFLATION??? Gosh knows what it is today.And how does this cover the costs of all that we discussed in PART ONE? If we want a system that promotes fertility control and a sustainable population (since our population is predicted to hike from 6.6 billion to 9.1 billion in 2050), we need to provide the resources for broke people to do so! It has been noted that restless people get frisky! And that means the medical means to stay healthy.

***The poverty thresholds are updated annually for current price changes (income unadjusted for inflation) and not changed in constant-dollar terms (income after inflation)

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36 states reporting declining unemployment – Dec. 18, 2009.

Full story above….

This post is going to be two-fold, for your pleasure…

Supposedly more and more states are reporting declining in unemployment (yay!) but CNN had some troubling stats to go along with these findings. According to CNN and The Department of Labor, the unemployment gap between whites and blacks is becoming wider and wider, which is making many debate as to the reasons for this. As of now, Black Americans have the highest rates of unemployment. Educated Black Americans also have the highest rates of unemployment among those who have obtained higher education.

In a different part of the world, the gap in unemployment seems to be following racial lines as well:

According to the New York Times:

“Although South Africa is the continent’s wealthiest country, income inequality remains among the worst in the world. About 29 percent of blacks are unemployed, compared with 5 percent of whites. When statistics include discouraged workers, or dropouts from the labor force, the jobless rate climbs to nearly 50 percent. Most of the unemployed have never held a single job, according to a study by a panel of international economists.”

Tatenda G. talks some more about what is really going on down in South Africa:

The strengthening of the rand against the dollar is creating a new dip in the unemployment situation of this country. Though the US dollar has been stronger recently, the weakening of the US dollar directly affects our manufacturing and production sectors, and has since the beginning of 2009. It is speculated that if the dollar does not get stronger, two million jobs are going to be lost due to the for casted cutting down in production (this is because the US is not importing or exporting goods with SA anymore). Two more million people on the streets, two million more job hunters, two million people without a paycheck. The situation is getting more and more tense everyday.

Even the police have been reporting about an increase in basic commodity theft from grocery stores. Most people are finding it hard to cope with the situation so they have resorted to crime. A lot of people now have a low self-esteem and have given up hope on getting jobs. The public shelters are overflowing with people that can not afford to pay rent. I even know of some people that are buying TB contaminated *sputum so that they be be diagnosed with the disease and be put on the government disability fund just to get a little bit of cash and get along with the requirements of their everyday lives.

This situation has also led to a decline in the services rendered by local governments. Just recently Durban commuters were stranded after the local bus service provider pulled from the roads because they could not offer the service anymore and a lot people lost their jobs due to that situation. Also in Cape Town, a lot of train commuters were left without a plan after the Metrorail workers went on strike requesting wage increases. Most people did not work due to the lack of transportation further plunging the production and the revenue into turmoil .

Unless a logical and effective step is taken, and  we all try to figure a way of empowering ourselves and becoming our own bosses…this situation will never change…

This is disgusting, but sputum is  ”matter that is expectorated from the respiratory tract, such as mucus or phlegm”

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HO HO HO!!!!!

Yes it is the Holidays, so if you have a job, Santa came early, if not…well…kick up your heels until the new fresh year!

Have you thought about your Old Year’s goals? If you completed those, then it is time to move on to what needs to be done for next year.

Here are some tips courtesy of HOC on preparing for your 2010 Job Search:

• Update your resume: look over it, and make sure everything is on point, also get someone else to look at it if you can. If you hope to apply for a position, unless the position has a specific date before the New Year, wait to submit it. This may seem counterintuitive, but a lot of offices are in holiday mode, so if you submit it now, no one may even pay it any attention…

• Keep your profile current: as in social profile. Make sure everything is up to date, and accurate, as well as decent. A lot of employers are looking at your facebook or linked in…so don’t give them any excuse to sack you before you even start

• Put your best digital foot forward: Google yourself. What do you find? If you find anything that can be incriminating, and you can control it being up there, fix it! Employers Google people to see what they can find, and sometimes it aint pretty…

• Make new friends: When you go to these Christmas parties and maybe even New Year parties, mingle, and network, you never know who will be worth contacting after the glitter settles.

• Prepare your references: call up people you know both professional and otherwise and ask them if you can still depend on them as a reference. Aim to do it next Monday if you can, but if not, aim for Jan. 2, or 3rd by the latest.

Also a Bonus:

Can you see me? Can you see me NOW?

What NOT to wear to a Job interview: (also courtesy of HOC)

Some of these shocked me, but good to keep in mind:

• Sunglasses on your head, or headphones on your neck, your interviewer should never see either
• no backpacks, or fannypacks, briefcases and portfolios will do
• too-short skirts
• the wrong tie (what does that mean?)
• overly bright or large patterned clothing
• heavy makeup (on anyone)
• Earrings on men
• More than one set of earrings on women
• facial piercing, tongue jewelry or visible tattoos
• ill-fitting clothes
• long fingernails, especially with bright or specialty polishes
• unnatural hair colors and styles
• short-sleeved shirts
• fishnets, patterned hosiery or bare legs
• men whose socks don’t match their shoes
• rumpled or stained clothing
• scuffed or inappropriate footwear
• strong aftershaves, perfumes of colognes
• belts and shoes that don’t match
• Telltale signs that you are wearing a new suit

the bold ones I found shocking…anything missing? Feel free to comment, and let us know what else should NOT be worn on an interview…

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James Madison does it right!

Because Broke People Deserve Freedoms too!

2.  The Right to keep and bear Personality (or attitude).

If anyone uses Ageism against a hip young person just trying to make it in the world or if any person tries to deny me a job because they think I’m too old to learn new things, I will tell them about themselves. If it is the former, I will point out that though I may have fewer crow’s feet and need not demand respect with a surname to feel like a bigger person (first name is fine by me), I am not to be taken lightly nor will I receive condescending treatment lying down (got that from Elin, tiger’s wife). If it is the latter, I will tell them to take a psychology class to learn about the brain and the fact that although my action potentials and neuro synapses may not fire up like they did when I was a drooling baby, I am still a capable individual.

Also, I will not become an office drone!

A well-respected workforce, being necessary to the security of a FREE State and wellbeing of all, the right of the people to keep and bear personality (or attitude), shall not be infringed.

*****All written material on this blog is copyrighted and owned by the individuals who created this blog.  In no manner should the material written be used in any fashion whatsoever without the consent of the writers.  You will be sued.

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Does this look fake? Oh who cares, I'm a cat

Everyone always thinks that the other guy’s life is so much better. He has a lexus; she has a dog; he has a girlfriend; she has a sugar daddy; he has a corporate job and makes dough; she has blond hair.

Since recapping with some former colleagues, I have found that though I may need to mow my own lawn, the grass only seems greener on the other side.

One of my friends sounded like he was living the HOLLYWOOD dream: graduated top class; secured an apartment and car in LA; then three months after graduation a job with a production company; still with his longtime girlfriend; just had some close friends visit.

The reality: He was a secretary doing nothing creative and always getting yelled at for mistakes, he worked long 9-12 hour days, he was getting paid diddly squat after taxes, and the company wasn’t even making movies.

WOWOWOWOWO.

Another friend was prepping to be a lawyer or a professor:  just took his LSATs; applying for joint programs; happily married, enviable because he had options and yummy home-cooked food every day.

The reality: He doesn’t even really want to be a lawyer or poli sci major, doesn’t really know what else to do because that is the only thing he is good at even though he thinks it’s sort of BS.  His main phrase: Life is suffering. 

WOWOWOWOWOWOWO.

Another friend got a full ride to engineering school for a PHD. He also got at least a 15,000 dollar yearly stipend to just be a student and do some assisting. Had mojo. 

Reality: he can’t wait to go back to his undergraduate block party because those were the days of fun and friendship. Plus, the girl he liked in grad school had a roommate that came on to him, which resulted in them both yelling at him. PLUS, he has not made any real friends.  Plus, it’s so bad he might just get his masters and leave. 

WOWOWOWOWW

Another friend got her dream job as an event planner in NY with an art company. Problem? They might not sponsor her to stay in the US because she is international. 

So all in all, don’t feel bad when things aren’t going your way. It’s not all smiles.  But please don’t think that this means be OK with your life right now.  Continue gardening your lawn and make it the best you can be.   Life is short.  Just don’t let anyone with a fancy suit faze you.  If they are anything like my coworker, his wife is probably sleeping on the floor with the kids.

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Rating: negative infinity

I’ve been wanting to blow up this spot for a while now. Just haven’t had a chance to watch the movie. So, I’m going to rate the trailer. Out of 10.  10 being the best.

Now, when this first came out Ebbs and I, whilst planning the blog, wanted to watch it so we could write a review of a movie that is relevant to all of us Unemployed. To say the least, we were so appalled, we didn’t even want to watch it.

Firstly, although Alexis Bledel was popular on Gilmore Girls, the ranks of the unemployed need someone who we can relate to and, therefore, respect. That means someone who CAN ACT.

Like America Farerra or Shrek.

I don’t have a job so I sit on my ‘ass’ all day!

Even the typical underdog Spider man would do.

- 2

Secondly, the movie features all white people. We live in America. Where are the minorities? Didn’t they hear about the complaints Sex and the City had?  (In the series, the protagonists lived in NY, the most diverse city ever , and it only featured white people.  In the movie, they had one the black girl who was an assistant.  Even more shocking, they had a part where she who was soooo grateful for getting a nice bag from a white person — typical stereotype and symbol of America’s history of oppression)

And if not, don’t they read the news?   Minorities are getting it the worst. This brought my rating to a BIG FAT zero.

0

Thirdly, the fact that it featured unemployed people who find LOVE brought my arbitrary rating down to a negative. I’m not down on love, I’m just into reality. And the reality is that you shouldn’t be broke and sitting around and waiting for someone to save you from yourself.

-5

Fourthly, who is this movie targeting?  DUH, the unemployed.

Then it follows: can the unemployed afford to watch a 10-12 dollar movie in the theaters?  Probably not.  Negative, negative.

And you wouldn’t go on a date to watch this right?

Dude:      “Hey baby, let’s be voyeuristic and watch the struggles of everyone around us …. (including me, but you don’t know about that, which is why I didn’t buy you dinner)

My big bad voyeuristic self:             How romantic.

This double negative doesn’t equal a positive. Actually, it’s SO BAD it’s more an infinity negative (As in not even credible enough to be a real number).

______________

When I scrape up enough cash that I don’t mind spending on “discretionaries” then I’ll rate the movie. Or just save it and put in the bank.

Call me a hater but our friend Wikipedia agrees:

The film received generally negative-to-mixed reviews by film critics and moviegoers alike. It stands with a “rotten” 9% approval rating by 79 critics at Rotten Tomatoes (8% of the site’s 25 top critics). By comparison, it has a finer score of 37 at Metacritic, based on 25 reviews, which yet still indicates “generally unfavorable reviews”.

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They are sexy, no doubt about it ... and even during wartime and famine.

Yes, sometimes being alive can be a drag.  I mean with or without a job, sometimes you just lose the motivation to be the best you can possibly be. 

Here are some tips to maintain your sexy. 

1)      Deep condition for shiny healthy hair  — Mix egg yolk and milk together in a bowl and coat your dry, unwashed hair for 30 minutes.  It’s best to put a towel over it to trap in heat and keep you from dripping all over the place and incurring the wrath of your family.  Then rinse and shampoo and condition as usual.

 If you don’t have a lot of hair …  well…  try not to grow it on one side and sweep over.  Not sexy. 

 2)      Eat a fruit or two…. Not only does it help you go number 2 and feel lighter overall (yes, pun intended) but there are nutrients that can keep you from getting sick.  Wash the fruit in vinegar water to kill bacteria. 

3)      DRINK LOTS OF WATER.  In the office, you are basically trapped in an air-conditioned prison, which adds to dry eyes, dry mouth, dry skin, and dry attitude.   Water keeps your muscles flexible.  I think that’s why I have back pain right now…

 5)      Just hang.  Literally.  Bend over from your natural waist bend, NOT your back.  People always mistake the two and just hang around looking at your toes.  Let your head be heavy and sway a little side to side to stretch your back.  It promotes relaxation and flexibility.  

No excuses not to!   Just take a bathroom break and you can get the latter of No. 2 done (literally and list-wise) and do this in the stall.  Heck, one might promote the other!

4)       Walk tall but don’t point your nose up. Even if you are the bomb and everyone should know it, don’t need to prove yourself by pointing your nose up.  That just causes tension in your neck and your eyes to have to work harder.   And theater people will know you are posing. 

 I know this sounds ABCs but come on, if we just listened to our bodies, we wouldn’t be so stressed now would we?   And taking small steps to care for yourself will make you feel better.  AND IT’S CHEAP, IF NOT FREE! 

More tips to comebut let’s start with basics!   And I’ll try to include some videos so it’s easier to follow. 

Obsolete When All Are Employed

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Our main man James Madison has inspired us to create our own Unemployed Bill of Rights, because broke people deserve freedoms too! This is the first of 10, look out for the rest in the upcoming posts…

1. Freedom to be unemployed, and freedom from the shame of being unemployed

If one more person asks me what my future goals are, or implies that I am not doing enough with my life…there are no words that can describe what my initial reaction will be…when that day comes and that special someone would be stupid enough to step to me in that way, it will be drama. I just need to have the right to be unemployed, and be respected as a human being. I should not have to explain myself. I should not have to list my goals in graphic detail. I should not have to apologize to anyone, and I should have no shame in my status as an unemployed American. The first step in dealing with unemployment is coming to terms with being without a job, so one could get off one’s haunches and find one!

No person, in time of peace, war, or anything in between, shall bear uninvited judgment on another persons status of employment or unemployment. If you don’t like the fact I don’t have job, get me one!

*****All written material on this blog is copyrighted and owned by the individuals who created this blog.  In no manner should the material written be used in any fashion whatsoever without the consent of the writers.  You will be sued.

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Here is the first report from our South Africa Correspondent, Tatenda. It was posted a couple of weeks ago, but I felt a need to repost it, to help keep him in mind because he has more good stuff coming our way real soon…If you are interested in sharing what is going on in your part of the world, please hit us up at thunemploymentchronicles@gmail.com….or if you would like to be correspondent, also hit us up as well!!

Presidente Jacob Zuma, not our correspondent Tate, courtesy MSNBC

Every other day I wake up, wash my face and quicky go down stairs to get my morning newspaper only to be greeted by shocking headlines such as: “27 million South Africans underemployed”. After reading this article I realized how extreme the situation has become lately with more than 18 million being unemployed and the rest earning below the stipulated minimum wage. Most people are now directly affected by this chronic situation, even the employed live in constant fear of loseing their jobs because of too much competition in the job market and this has fuelled nepotism. Its no longer about how qualified you are its now about who you know.
It was disturbing to see soldiers demonstrating to address their unrests against the government due to undermployment. The government is feeling the strain of the recession so they have drastically cut down on income raises of all civil servants, and soldiers were the worst affected given the fact that their salaries fall way below the stipulated minimum wage. The truth is that the government has failed to take care of thoes who have been loyal to its departments. Due to skyrocketing tax deficits, the situation of increasing wages to all civil servant remains a dream. It has led to a sad situation of mass resignation from a lot of government professionals like nurses and doctors who head for Europe, Australia and and the United States, and this has left a huge void in most departments….

Tatenda G.

South Africa correspondent.

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